See What Had Happened Was…

Over here in 9pm central land, all of my west coastener friends were furious that their attempts to be the first to know what happened on the season premiere of the highly anticipated The Game was ruined because we gave them a play by play analysis of every line via fb updates and tweets. Welp, I plan on doing that here every week. Here’s what happened this week. Or at least what I saw from my tv screen.

Melanie aka Girl Melanie aka Med School aka Psycho for her man is still plotting to erase Janai and DJ from Derwin’s memory. She quit her residency so she could be a wife. Because we all know female doctors don’t have husbands besides Meridith Grey and Christina Yang.

Derwin went from a nobody to a celebrity baller with an endorsement from Nike. He is still corny.

Janai (is that how u spell her name?) and Med-School actually get along and bond momentarily over a purse Essence Magazine gave Girl Melanie.

(Speaking of Nike and Essence – I wonder how much did they pay to have their names dropped on the BET’s larger season premiere)

Jason is still cheap and sarcastic. Refuses to play because they aren’t paying enough.

Kelly has a new reality show called “Ex-Baller’s Wives” which I believe should really be the name of any reality show on television that features mistresses of athletes. She’s tatted up, got the snazzy haircut, and is a little crazier than I remembered.

Brit Brat is a bitc…I mean brat. The new Brit Brat is actually a brat. (Jason spoke it into existence and like Inception he planted in her subconscious thus transmuting the nickname into it’s physical equivalent)

Malik is headed towards a downward spiral of pitful, his career is on the line and he’s having an affair with the owner of the Sabers wife who happens to be Megan Good. Her character’s name is irrelevant because we’ll just always call her Megan Good anyway.

Tasha, who now represents Derwin, is a cougar and has started smoking black and milds.

TeeTee has gotten smarter, runs a chicken truck, and has a girlfriend.

Mr. 106&Park is cheating on Mrs. 106&Park with Tasha for more airtime. BET couldn’t have picked a better time to slap his face on a series with fifty-leven-thousand-million viewers. Thumbs up to BET for the marketing round table discussion that led to him getting that role.

Sherea from The Real Housewives of Atlanta had a 2.5 second appearence as herself. Make that 1.5 seconds.

Chris Webber needs about three more acting classes and he’s there

In short, instead of just going to the Maury show, Melanie tested the baby to see if it was Derwin’s. It wasn’t. Melanie broke the news to him. Then two commercial breaks later, the baby was his again. Melanie didn’t tell him…

Lisa B.
www.liftedsoul.com
www.YouTube.com/lisabpoetry